A sign from God

Even before we traveled to China to adopt our daughter, I felt the need to add more children to our family. I have the perfect plan which was to have another child, then adopt the child opposite the sex we had. It sounds like the perfect plan to me. Travis thinks I'm crazy to want 4, but is amazing at all the crazy and wonderful thoughts that enter this crazy head of mine. I think my wanting of a big family is mostly due to my wonderful family. I have 3 siblings and couldn't be more thankful for all of them and my parents. We are all so very close and truly love eachother.

Right after we got home from China, I was having feelings of getting started to adopt again. However, with so many adjustments of coming home for Jie and for us, it seemed to stress me out everytime I think about it. However, even with the stress, I continued to push forward thinking God was guiding me in this direction. A close adoption friend of mine who adopted from Guatemala had past on information to me of a young boy in a wheel chair in China that resides in the Philip Hayden foundation. He was about to expire out of the system in June 2009, which means he is turning 13 and will longer be on open for adoption. My heart ached for this boy, who deserves a wonderful family, but I didn't feel was my son. So I have continued to pray for him, he is still waiting for a family to give him a forever home. I felt a great amount of guilt for not adopting him, so I turned to God, to guide me in the right direction as I continue to keep him in my prayers.

I felt like I was being guided to adopt, so the same friend turned me in the direction of WACAP. They have many children who most of the expenses are paid for to bring them home. I looked and immediately found a little boy who was 7 days older then Jie. Although Travis thought I was crazy, he didn't prevent or discourage me from pursuing this beautiful boy. I continued to look at this boy for days without moving forward to viewing his profile. It wasn't until Tuesday of this week that I realized my role in all of these signs from God. Last weekend, I was asked by someone close to me about adoption, so I knew I needed to pass on http://www.wacap.org/ 's website to her, then on Tuesday, I was approached by a mother of one of Trayjan's classmates at school who is aching in her heart to adopt. She needed some advice and ask me how she could adopt with little finances. OH MY GOODNESS! Now I knew for sure the reason I was led to this organization. Although I know the time may come, I don't feel it in my heart to adopt at this time, so I knew my confusion was GOD leading me to this information in hopes to bring children home through others. The amazing thing was as I looked for the boy on the site Thursday morning, he is no longer available. So I know he was not meant to be our son, I know God was just using me as his voice to lead people to WACAP. Our God is so amazing, we just have to listen to him.

These children need homes, and we are all GOD's children. I look at my son and my daughter as my children. I know God led Travis and I to both our children, just in different ways. I pray today and each day for these children. So as I realize and listen to God's signs today, I pray that others will listen and follow his guidance to adopt a child, to give them the loving home they all deserve.